Let’s start by talking about how transitions in life are often seen as hurdles, but I believe they’re actually launching pads for personal growth. We’ve started a new year and that in itself is one of life’s transitions. Many of us will have resolutions and intentions that we are looking to accomplish to get to the next phase of whatever we desire. The work and action we take during this period, I believe, becomes a lens for us to rediscover our true selves during this transition.
When we talk about self-discovery, it’s not just an exercise in navel-gazing. It’s about getting to know what makes us tick, what fills our hearts, and understanding who we are at a core level and how we can leverage times of change to truly come into our own.
I have experienced some life-transforming transitions from which I have come to rediscover who I truly am through cultivating a good amount of self-worth and practices like self-compassion and self-care, which are the themes I discussed on this page.
You’re going to find out about the undeniable impact life transitions have on our sense of self-worth. Whether it’s starting a new job, moving to a new city, or ending a relationship, these events challenge our established sense of identity, prompt us to question our values, and, in turn, our inherent worth.
Now, if you think that adapting to change is about clinging to the old you, think again. A big part of growing through transitions involves the ability to not only expect change but to welcome it as part of your personal evolution. It’s a framework for positive adaptation, where your understanding of self-worth grows and adapts, just as you do.
Almost a decade ago I had to move to a different country – England because of a job. It wasn’t my first choice but as I was desperate to progress in my career I made the move. In this experience, I had 2 major transitions going on, that of a new career and relocation. I moved to a country where I had no family, no actual friends and no real knowledge of how the system worked as compared to what I knew.
There were many occasions where I wondered if that was the right decision but I knew I was doing it for a reason, something I truly desired. I went through the motions but with a good foundation in faith, I started adapting. I began venturing out to neighbours, finding my local shops and sports centres after all the legal documentation was in place. I needed to readjust not only my environment but the person I was at that time.
The Psychology of Self-Reconstruction
In my opinion, there’s a fascinating process at work when you start to piece yourself back together during life’s shifts. You’re not just surviving; you’re becoming. This transformative phase can feel like navigating a complex maze without a map, but here’s where it gets interesting.
How do you reinvent yourself when everything you know seems to be in flux? It takes being open and ok to step out of your comfort zone. It takes getting in touch with your true self, peeling back the layers of character shaped by previous influences and figuring out new things that align with who you are at your core.
The journey involves passing through various stages of self-redefinition. Initially, there’s often a sense of loss or confusion as you confront the change. Gradually, you shift towards exploration, trying on new roles, and experimenting with different aspects of your personality.
This isn’t just about shedding your old self; it’s also about thriving and resilience. How well you bounce back and adapt emotionally will define this period. It’s essential to foster resilience to weather the storm of change and emerge with a renewed sense of identity.
Now what does this mean in practical terms? It means giving yourself permission to grieve what’s been left behind while also staying open to the possibilities of the new. It’s about validating your feelings and working through them with compassion, patience and kindness towards yourself.
Navigating Life’s Shifts with Grace
When you’re facing life transitions, it can feel like you’re walking a tightrope without a net. As already mentioned these transitions can be anything from a new job, new school, new city/country, new relationship or whatever, we will be discussing some of these transitions in upcoming articles.
Yet, these shifts offer powerful moments for personal rediscovery and a chance to redefine your self-worth. In this section, I’m going to share some strategies to help you maintain balance and move through transitions with a sense of purpose and grace.
The key to navigating life transitions effectively is learning to cultivate self-compassion. It’s about giving yourself the understanding and kindness you’d offer a good friend. When the ground beneath you feels shaky, self-compassion acts as an anchor, providing stability and reassurance, helping you hold onto the essence of who you are while you rediscover your path. Treat yourself with the same thoughtfulness you would a dear one, and be easy on yourself when figuring out things in this new chapter.
We are going to find out about how vital it is to align life changes with personal values. As you transition, check in with your core beliefs and values to ensure the shifts you’re experiencing resonate with your true self. When changes align with what matters most to you, they contribute positively to your sense of self-worth, instead of diminishing it.
Next, we’ll delve into the foundations of self-worth and explore how you can identify and reinforce this critical aspect of your identity throughout life’s inevitable transitions.
Embracing Who You Truly Are: The Foundations of Self-Worth
Self-worth is the bedrock of who we are. It’s not something that fluctuates with the events of our lives, but rather, it’s a constant part of our inner landscape. As you wade through life’s transitions, it’s critical to remember this distinction. These changes, whether they’re career moves, relationships beginning or ending, or personal milestones, can jostle your sense of self, but they don’t define your worth.
When we talk about self-worth, we’re delving into how deeply you value and accept yourself. It’s a value that should remain untouched by external shifts. However, it’s not uncommon for these upheavals to cause some seismic shifts in how you perceive your value. This is why understanding the roots of your self-worth is essential. When you’re rooted in a deep, unwavering appreciation of yourself, transitions become not just manageable but opportunities to grow and reinforce that foundation.
So, how do you identify these roots and strengthen them?
Start by reflecting on what you inherently value in yourself, independent of your achievements or roles. It might be your capacity for kindness, your resilience, your curiosity, or your creativity. These traits persist, no matter what you’re going through. When life shakes things up, return to these constants. They’re your lifeline back to a state of equilibrium.
Angling towards the intertwining of being and becoming can also bolster your self-worth during personal transitions. This perspective appreciates who you are at this moment while also recognizing who you are evolving into. It’s about embracing both the present and the potential future versions of yourself, without judgment. By doing this, you grant yourself the space to experiment, make mistakes, and ultimately, transition with your self-worth intact.
Now, let’s look at how the journey toward self-actualization, a concept introduced by Abraham Maslow, can help orient your rediscovery process during these life transitions. It’s about tapping into your hierarchy of needs and figuring out how each one can be better met through the changes you encounter. In essence, taking the transition as a stepping stone to not just rediscover but also refine and redevelop yourself.
The Road to Self-Actualization in Times of Transition
Whilst life transitions can feel like navigating uncharted territories, it’s also during these times that your concept of self-worth is put to the test. What I’m going to talk about is how the framework of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs can serve as a guidepost during transitions. Maslow broke down human needs into five levels, suggesting that only after meeting basic needs like food, safety, and belonging, can we pursue self-actualization — the fulfilment of our personal potential.
Self-actualization isn’t a static state; it’s a continuous journey, especially during life transitions. For many of us, it’s an opportunity to reassess and rediscover what’s truly important. I can tell us about people who have undergone significant life changes, from career shifts to personal losses, and how these experiences led them to uncover new passions or to foster a deeper understanding of themselves.
Let’s say you’re in the midst of a major life shift. You might feel adrift, but this is when you can lay a foundation for self-actualization. Assess your current situation and ask yourself, ‘What really matters to me now?’ This isn’t just about picking up a new hobby or setting a career goal; it’s about how these goals resonate with your evolving self-worth.
If you want to rediscover yourself through these transitions, you’ll likely need to adjust your approach down the road. Exploring your interests, values, and what you aspire to be can lead to profound personal shifts. These give rise to renewed goals that are both fulfilling and aligned with your newfound sense of self-worth.
Before my move to England, I found my second greatest passion which is baking during my three year long unemployment phase. It was in the midst of my lowest point then that I discovered that baking was my happy place and I was a really good baker. From not being able to bake anything from scratch apart from a box to coming up with my own recipes and receiving orders in a matter of months, this period had bourn something in me.
It wasn’t apparent at that time all I needed was to feel good about myself and be good at something but years after as I reflected I realised that I had discovered a new side of me in this transition. I didn’t know what i was doing but the feeling I got every time i baked something which people enjoyed grew my sense of worth and value. It gave me some confidence that I hadn’t felt in a long time and anyone who’s been receiving rejections will now this feeling.
It’s perfectly normal to feel uncertainty during transitions. Remember, your first attempt doesn’t need to be your last. With each step, you’re learning and growing. Each new insight or experience adds another piece to the puzzle of who you are becoming.
Cultivating a Renewed Sense of Identity
It is worth noting that transitioning through different phases of life doesn’t just challenge our sense of self; it offers a remarkable opportunity to grow it. Every transition we face is a chance to refine and redefine who we are.
There are several personal discovery tools that can help to do the inner work and yes we need to do it. Just going through the motions will eventually get you to a point where the transition isn’t as daunting but taking charge of your well-being and identity during the transition will result in thriving not just surviving.
Choosing something that resonates with you and your values whenever you find yourself in a life transition can help to gradually get back on course and also serve as the first step towards reinforcing your self-identity. Whether it’s through journaling, therapy, mindfulness, or creative pursuits, what matters is taking action.
Summing It All Up
There is power in personal narratives. It’s one thing to experience changes; it’s another to weave these into the story of who we are. We are allowed to craft our own narrative with intention, focusing on resilience and self-worth, and watching as our identity solidifies around the new chapters of our life.
Yes I do appreciate that it’s not very easy to do this, to bounce back and I am not downplaying this fact but in any new transition, we can either become support characters or main characters in our lives movies. We can become the authors of how this new transition plays out and only through the intentional rediscovery of the self.
So, I hope that you embrace the concept of celebrating the ‘new’ you in whatever phase you are in now. Acknowledge your journey with kindness and pride. Whether the changes are big or small, every step in your transition is worth recognizing. Celebrate your growth, your learning, and the unique person you are becoming. I would love to know how you are coping with or getting through a transition now or if you have a question, do ask and kindly share your thoughts in the comments.
Love & Light
Sheila Daisy
